Sunday, 23 August 2009

Why I am Here

For a long time now I have had a fantasy that remains merely that: a fantasy. I've thought for a long time now that it would be quite romantic to walk out of my old life with nothing but the clothes on my back, the shoes on my feet, and the God in my heart, and just start over, leaving the old completely behind.

During my second year studying at university, I commuted in for my lectures, a good hour and a half journey each way, and in the case of early lectures I found myself catching a train that left before 7am. I remember waiting on the platform week after week, in the cold and the dark, and watching the trains arriving at the platform opposite. There was one which left just after mine that went all the way to Aberdeen, and I wondered, just wondered, what would happen if one day I changed platforms and hopped on that train instead...

It's been done. People disappear all the time, sometimes without even meaning to, but I know I could never do that. I could never walk out on Spud, or the family and friends I love more than life itself; or even the life that I am just beginning to love, the life that seems to have just begun for me. I could not leave anyone behind and put them through the agony of not knowing where I am, how I am, if I am alive even.

There is a point to this all, because this is effectively what I have done with my blog. I started toying with blogspot last October, and began blogging regularly in January. My old blog currently holds over a hundred posts now, and I feel it's time for a change. When I begin something new, I always feel I leap into it too quickly, without really thinking things over beforehand. With my last blog I chose a name just for the sake of it, a name I am no longer content with; I put too much of myself into it, and what I wrote was mostly pointless, unoriginal ramble. That is not to say that I won't write personal blogs here, with a little about myself and my life, but it will all be undercover of a new name, an alias if you like, and I want to adopt my own personal style.

My blog is named The Passing Place because no doubt people will pass through here, and maybe read an entry or two if they have a moment to spare, but they might not necessarily stay and become regular followers. This is fine by me. I don't blog because I want followers (although I appreciate anyone who does decide to follow - it is nice to know that what I write is of interest to someone) but because I like having my own corner, my own space to write what I wish.

1 comment:

Bethany Mason said...

I know exactly what you are writing about in this post as you have more or less explained me lol